Sunday 22 March 2015

Life Is Short - A Saying I Hate

The assumption that life whisks us by is a horrid idea. The majority of us control our own reality, we allow the world to influence us to some degree. Saying that life flashes by or 'I can't wait for the weekend' means that is how our reality will be effected.

Time itself is completely subjective. This isn't pseudo-science, this is fact: the larger the gravitational pull the slower time will move. For example a day on a planet with twice the gravitational pull of Earth will be 48 hours. However it will 48 hours to the people on Earth but the people on the planet it will be 24 hours. The people on the larger planet are existing at twice the length of time to the people on Earth. The previous statement is actually false since time is subjective, it could easily be Earth's time is quicker but again this statement is based on a point of view not an objective view point.



To bring it back to our reality we do control how we perceive time. If we perceive life as short and existing in the blink of an eye then that is how it will exist. Yet if we look at if from the view point of a housefly our lives take a huge amount of space in the linear progression of time. Life does not flash by it simply is there and we must seize it. Not that Carpe Diem bullshit because how can you seize the day when you are working a 9-5, with 2 kids and a pile of bills to focus on. We just have to be aware that time is simply a man-made construct to objectify existence and not a depressing measurement for how ineffectual we are to the grandness of reality.

The most important thing is everyone has to stop using the phrase 'I can't wait'. I am against the banning of most things, except recreational usage of bicycle shorts but I could be argued into the banning of the phrase. To be clear I am not saying impatience is the worst thing ever because I can be extremely impatient a times. The statement is against overlooking the extraordinary mundane things that happen in between the boring exceptional things we get excited for. Enjoying your morning routine, or your commute to work, or Tuesday nights can be difficult but simply experience them, live them. Don't overlook the moments because they make up the majority of your time which make them special in their own right compared to the unique experiences we all look forward to.

And that's it: We don't have to stop being excited for these brilliant unique collection of moments we just have to look forward to them. I've came to the conclusion that we don't actually exist solely in the present because the present is always in the past, the exact present is continuous steam of future into present into past. Looking forward is being the future, present and past. 'Looking forward' to something is being excited about the continuous stream of time and how we exist in all those beautiful drops of  the ocean of time because to quote one of the most amazing films ever 'What is an ocean but a multitude of drops.'


Thursday 19 March 2015

It's Just Getting Too Much

I am a man of winter. I'm so English I always had an affinity to the weather during the winter but in New York it has just became too much. This is what I am feeling right now...


Tuesday 17 March 2015

Games I Can't Stop Playing

Nostalgia is one of my biggest flaws. A wise man once said 'Look forward not back' I constantly disregard this saying when it comes to games. I am not saying games today aren't as good as their predecessors, but my golden years of gaming are definitely behind me. This has led to me always replaying old games, to recomplete or just have fun on. Below is a list of my favourite games to replay:

1. Tony Hawk's Underground



The first and best in the series has to be first in the list. I've completed it countless times as the story, gameplay and characters were so easy to fall in love with. It combined the addictive over-the-top play of the Tony Hawk's skating series with a great rags-to-riches story. It was also one of, if not the, first skating games in which you could jump off your board and walk around and also drive cars. The story did not take anything from the gameplay which was consistently crazy and fun. An easy game that you can jump on no matter your mood.

2. Halo: Combat Evolved



We all know this game as the one of the most revolutionary games ever. Changing a lot of things not only in FPS but games in general. This particular game did not have the online multiplayer it's successors had yet to me me it was the best out of them all. The action was perfect as there was no online multiplayer distracting the game developers so everything was focused on the single player. When compared with Halo 2, 3 and 13 you can see were the story got the benefit on the first time around. None of the Halo's have managed to captured the atmosphere this game had, none of them could better or even equal the twisting yet simple storyline, and none of them could better the level Assault on the Control Room.

3. Warriors


Even Rembrandt was sick, RIP.


The PS2 release was how a movie to game...game should be made. Every game company wanting to make the transition should study how this game was made. It was perfect. It had a rich and unique back story for all the fans of the film who wanted to know more about their characters and favourite street gang. It played along with the film as if the two were twins. It also contained some of the most gruesome and violent fighting systems ever, for example Cleo jumping on people's heads during rage mode. This game was just so much fun. It took nothing away from the film, it made you want to watch the film more which in turn made you want to play the game more.

4. DOOM for PSX



There will be some whiplash from this statement but do not go into a frenzy just yet let me explain: The PSX version of DOOM was the best, better than the PC and N64. Now the N64 version was nothing much but the PC version was obviously a good game. It had a storyline and better graphics, modding etc. But the game itself was not as good as the PSX. The reason being was mainly the atmosphere. The music in the PC version was all heavy metal and it led the player to be more courageous and have little fear of what he was up against. The PSX version created an atmosphere of fear, the echoing of tortured souls, angry demons, and brainless zombies as well as an eerie soundtrack made this game quite frightening. Especially when you turn a corner and suddenly there is a Hell Knight towering above you and lets out a grinding roar which tests your bowel reflexes. All this coupled with the fact it was the first game I had with the PSX made a perfect DOOM shaped hole in my heart that needed refilling annually.

5. Resident Evil 2



I have talked about some of these games in my previous blogs but none so fondly as this bad boy. The best out of the Resident Evil series which combined the Horror of 1 and the action of 3. A perfect balance that led to me playing this game so many times I actually completed with it in 2 hours and 37 minutes without dying, sadly I saved which was a dick move but whatever I got over it so should you. This record may not be the best out of those youtubers out there but it was something I am certainly proud of as an 'Amateur Gamer.' The graphics had a great upgrade from the first and cutscenes meant a move immersive story, but more importantly the game was basically four games in one. Complete it with Leon and Claire separately you have the same story more or less. However continue the save with the discs reversed and you get a whole different face to the game as the stories entwined creating a story few games had achieved at this point. 


6. Mass Effect series (but 1 in particular)



It hurts, it still hurts. Ever since I ended three after that bastard update I haven't played it since but before that I completed these games so many times. It was ridiculous. Even though the action was a bit awful and the team AI was atrocious the story was just amazing. So in-depth so meticulously thought out and (up until the end of 3) the decisions had fantastic and interesting impact in the later story. Some of the most extensive and breathtaking environments any game has created. I played this game so much I discovered how many people you could have sex with on the first game, three is the answer (if there is more let me know). I completed it with all the classes, maxed out so many different characters, the greatest of my creations being Being-Willy Shepard of course, no wonder they never said my first name in the entire series! Brilliant and even though the end of 3 kind've fucked my life up forever I'm sure I will come back to it at some point...maybe. Just the Reaper Indoctrination theory would've fixed everything! If they had played along with it after that update it would've been fine, but no they had to ruin it, why did they land the Normandy in front of the reaper at the end just to save two of your teammates like WHY! Everyone knew it was a suicide mission, so why did they want to be saved? FUCK!!!

7. Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion



Okay let's bring it back to a happy place. Oblivion. No game has taken up so many hours of life than this game. My first place through, a Dark-Elf Warrior by the name of Penis-Face took at least 287 hours for me to stop playing and think 'Ok I've done enough.' I bought the game on a whim but it sent a message to the world saying 'This is how you make an RPG.' Built on the success of Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind it went on to achieve even greater feats. The endlessness of this game was staggering as the main storyline lay forgotten in your list of quests and murdering a bunch of people in a locked house in Skingrad for the Dark Brotherhood was your priority.

8. Sonic Adventure Dreamcast



Lastly but certainly not leastly was this glitchy, annoying but addictive game. One of the launch titles for my favourite console ever, Sonic Adventure re-launched a series that I had zero feelings for up to this point. After I had always returned to this game completing it over and over again. I knew it was a bad game in terms of dialogue, level design, animation, and gameplay but it was still just so much fun. It did have its plus points the character selection gave this game real lasting ability, the graphics were beautiful, and the story was actually good when you take into account all the characters who you could play lapped over each other without any error, impressive when compared to the gameplay. All these points gave Sonic Adventure a real quaint feel to it, even though it would be really frustrating at times, most of the time it was a nice relaxing game.

That's my list, I have stupidly sold a few of these games so if you have them lying around the house message me and we'll talk.

P.S. GTA would have been included but it was waaaaay too obvious.

Wednesday 4 March 2015

One of My Favourite Awkward Moments

In my previous blog, in which you have undoubtedly read & shared amongst your friends, you will remember a reference to an NHS letter. A letter inviting me to a free chlamydia screening.

These letters are age specific they are sent to young adults as a way of saying 'Hey that green thing growing from you isn't embarrassing, why don't we sort it out though'. It's truly a great message, and I whole-heartedly agree with how the NHS approach this blight on the young and the reckless.

To digress for a paragraph or two some of you may have noticed I am no longer Shaun Tyrell on facebook but Peter-Shaun Tyrell. Many of you may wonder why I have changed my social media tag. In actual fact Peter-Shaun Tyrell is my real name. My dad wanted to name me after him Peter, my mum disliked the idea so like any great married couple they comprised thus Peter-Shaun Tyrell was birthed. However the registrar general forgot to place the hyphen in the name.

What does this have to do with anything? Why is he telling us this? I hear you ask. Well my NHS records register me as Peter Tyrell...the same as my dad's.

That's right, my letter of invitation to a free chlamydia screening, confidential I might add, became my dad's invitation to a free chlamydia screening. 

I arrived home with an apology from my dad, we both had a nervous laugh in which I assured him it was just a random invitation before embarrassingly heading upstairs to have a wee which burned only slightly.

The End.

Monday 2 March 2015

Awkwardness of Facebook

The internet has allowed us to throw away the constraints of live human interaction. Socially inept people were able to communicate without hindrance or fear. Now the 21st Century is underway it has dawned on all of us that the social boundaries that segeragated people of different countries & cultures has bled over into social media.

What Facebook thinks it is

I have always had a huge phobia of being left out for anything. The main reason I skulk bitterely at you happy & adventurous bunch is because I'm petrified you won't invite me to any of the social things aka parties and get togethers. To avoid this I cut you off at the pass, strike the first blow, make the first move, take the initiative, give it fucking beans. How can I be rejected or overflooked if you cant see me or I ignore you first mwha!

Facebook was a chance to not care as I delved into the anonymous waters of the internet. Recently however I've become very aware of my exclusion from everything. It may have something to do with being 4000 miles away from my main bulk of 'friends' but my brain won't listen to logic. The only clear reason it sees is; as soon as I got on the plane everyone started having parties and getting engaged/pregnant #samething.

What it really is

No one bothers to reply to me anymore. My messages and comments are left awkwardly unreplied like a letter from the NHS inviting you to get screened for chlamydia. I feel like the ugly puppy; the 25-1 horse, or 75% of Benetiz's signing, sitting on that bench of the reserves...alone.

My social fears have come full circle and there is no place else to run, except the french 2nd division.